Eleiren (lifemovingfwd) wrote,

Solaris Liberatis

I did indeed name and bless my new home as Solaris Liberatis.  I know the conjugation is a tad off and I've mixed Latin and Greek, but oh well.  The meaning is clear enough, "Sunlight set free."  During the day, it's a very appropriate name.  Tonight, it's dark and dreary, damp and chilly.  I don't want to turn on the heater though.  It seems a waste to have the heat on for just a few degrees more warmth when I'm about to find my way to bed and sleep under warm blankets anyway.

The move wasn't entirely uneventful.  Nikki had a fit right in front of my friend who came to help us move.  I was thoroughly embarassed.  Thankfully, despite being in the rain, hail, and freezing cold winds, we got the move done and I didn't catch pneumonia!  I'm still not unpacked but I'm ok with that.  I had my wisdom teeth out two days after the move and that pretty much took up the rest of the week.

My cat, Xander, was miserable being alone.  I woke to him crying at his reflection in the mirror because he was so lonely.  I brought home a 6 month old, long-haired calico that I've named Mia.  They're busy chasing one another around right now.  He can't decide if he likes her or not apparently.  He gets close to her one moment, seems fine, and then hisses at her the next.  It's getting better, and he isn't crying anymore, so I think it'll work out well.

Cecil and I are still together at the present.  I seriously do not know what will come next.  Part of me just says give up and walk away.  Part of me says wait it out a little.  I'm refusing to take any action until I'm more settled.  Choices made in chaos aren't usually made well, and nothing is harmed by me staying for now.  Especially now that I have my own place.

Once I get it all unpacked, I'll post some pics and share the gorgeous views I get.  The kitchen window shows the entire valley and the sunset as it spreads out across the far horizon.  The balcony is completely hidden behind trees that reflect the light and wave glowing green leaves with golden trim.  There's a hummingbird, too.  He startled me quite soundly the first day here.  He just popped right up over the edge.  I will attest that hummingbirds can look surprised!  He recovered though and flew to a nearby branch where he looked at me as if to say, "Who are you and where is my food?"

I have so many plans for this place.  Plans that include preparing to finally buy a house.  I don't know if I'll settle in the city or outside it, but it's time.  I wasn't really ready to own a place before, honestly.  To many, I'm sure that sounds odd.  I didn't ever want to buy a place just because it was expected though.  I wanted to wait, I wanted to know that where I was, I'd be content to stay.  I've weathered much here, and yet in this place, more than any other, I always come out on top.  There is a stability and a strengthening force in this area that suits me well, so I am ready now, to prepare and find the home that will serve me the rest of my life.

The caveat to that is that if I can complete the plans for my writing and start making a sufficient income from it, I'll be buying an RV and travelling instead of buying a house.  I'll drive off to the mountains in the summer and write in the forests, then travel out to the beaches in the winter and learn about keeping sand out of computers while the waves sing their tales for me to trascribe.  Perhaps spring in the midwest, where I remember it so well from my childhood, watching the wildflowers bloom.  A trip to the northeast for the fall colors will have to happen, of course.  It seems requisite for any writer in the US.  And, think how much easier a book tour would be.  No scrambling through airports, dragging luggage and watching for pickpockets and praying your flights connect on time.  Just hop in the driver's seat after putting things away, and down the road I go to the next city, where I can sleep in my own bed, instead of a hotel, and see the sites and the people along the way.  So yes, a house unless I can do the RV, then the RV.

I am facing one frightening revelation today.  My youngest daughter, Cassie, has been having seizures.  The doctors thought it was a stress induced form that requires counseling, stress management, and anxiety pills to control.  She went to the hospital last night to be monitored for 24 hours.  They've extended the period to 48 hrs.  Her brain is throwing irregular activity patterns, meaning that the seizures are actual epilepsy, not stress.  How an otherwise healthy 22 yr old suddenly starts having seizures is beyond me.  I'm having her call me in the morning when the doctor comes to talk to her so I can get the information with her.

I know that epilepsy is pretty well controlled these days, but it's still a surprise, and a bit of a fright, given how suddenly this has begun.  I hope that the doctor will have answers that will give us a course to move forward with, and that her life won't be too heavily impacted by this.  I also want to take her boyfriend out to some dark place and work him over with a bat.  He actually had the nerve to accuse her of faking this.  I may not ever really forgive him for that, whether she ever knows that or not.

And so, I'm going to start working my way towards sleep.  Hopefully it'll be refreshing.  I'd really like to finish the unpacking and relax a bit these next two days I have off from work.
Tags: dreams, endings, goals, home, life, moving, real life, solarisliberatis, writing
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